wrigley field is MILF paradise
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
