Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Randomize
