I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Randomize
