How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
