I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
