I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Randomize
