you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
Randomize
