Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
Randomize