do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
