Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
Randomize
