Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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