Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
Randomize
