Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
