I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
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