a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
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