chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
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