so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
I think people are normalizing furries
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Randomize
