i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize