I need to stop coming to work sober
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Randomize