its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
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