i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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