YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Randomize
