ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
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