You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
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