im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
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