I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Randomize
