is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
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