yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
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