you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize
