New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize
