We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
