I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
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