I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
