I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Randomize
