I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
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