I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
Randomize