He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize
