how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Randomize
