Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
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