Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
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