you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
Randomize
