Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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