her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
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