Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
