Why did I call the Oregon Department of Transportation at 4:30 in the morning, and who did I talk to for three minutes?
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
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