I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
I have aggressive nipples.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
