everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
Randomize
