Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
