Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
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