We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
Randomize
